I am a native New Yorker with Puerto Rican ancestry. My husband, Jemar, is born & raised in Hawaii with Filipino ancestry. We currently live in Washington, DC with our 4 yr old daughter Sol.
Anytime anyone asks me “what do you do?” I don’t know how to answer.
What am I trained to do? What do I do for fun? What do I do all day? What do I do for money? or what do I do because I must?
Each answer is different.
What am I trained to do: I am a CA licensed psychotherapist/marriage and family therapist, MFT# 50380 since 2011. I have completed my 200HR Yoga Teacher Training, I am certified Reiki Master in the Usui method, and trained in Mindfulness Based Cognitive Therapy for depression by Zindel Segal.
What I do for fun: Travel. Some of my passport stamps include: Greece, Israel, Costa Rica, Nicaragua, Curacao, Jamaica, Kenya, China, Thailand, Cuba, Mexico, and coming soon Indonesia, I’m coming for you!!
I’ve lived in Queens, Long Island, Dallas, San Diego, New London, a year out of a suitcase, Oahu (where my daughter was born), Monterey, and now DC, and it’s made me quite crafty at tapping in to local culture and finding my way. I’m a bonafide urban adventurer & arts and culture enthusiast. I also love to do crazy workouts-hello ballet barre bootcamp, Zengo cycle in the dark, Daybreaker crack o’ dawn morning rave, flamenco, Afro cuban dance class, the sweatier the better. Gets the blood flowing and gets me out of my head. I mean let’s be clear… I’m no teeny tiny tight bodied fitness champ. Nope. I’m not even a size 4 (or 6 for that matter) but…I can run probably run a 10K without walking…IF I had to.
‘Fun and play’ are central to my functioning. It HEALS…it’s a fact. Mostly because I’m living proof, and also because I have witnessed it while working with abused and neglected children, teens, and family systems for over a decade. Keeping regular play dates is a way of life! Therefore, I subscribe to the firm standing of the play date. It’s not just for kids anymore, it’s for everyone…playdate with myself, with Jemar, with Sol, with my friends/family. PLAY DATES GIVE ME LIFE! Give me more playdates!!!! …Ok, I’m reeling it in.
What I do all day: Beastie Boys said it best “The girl is crafty like ice is cold”.
I’m mostly crafting a plan on how to sandwich a little pocket of fun, a walkabout, or a workout, into a some major mandatory boring ass adult responsibility.
My husband, Jemar is in the Navy so we are a military family. We live the military family gypsy life of picking up and moving every 3 years and starting over. Over… & over again. I’m a professional at figuring out where to go, playground bopping with my daughter, satisfying her inquiring mind & hungry belly ALL day, orchestrating the function of my household so we are all fed well, dressed, somewhat organized, making the most of our time together, having fun, learning, communicating, feeling rested, getting cultured, staying healthy, as well as keeping up with our individual hobbies & interests. This alone is bananas, and like AA says I try to keep it about “progress not perfection”.
What I do for money: I am the self proclaimed queen of the side hustle. Currently I Airbnb co-host other peoples homes here in DC. Which is essentially being a personalized property manager. My husband and I were Airbnb superhosts for over 5 years in our own homes in Hawaii and CA but no longer host since we downsized. I love Airbnb! Side hustling is an conscious choice both Jemar and I agree on, and have made some serious lifestyle changes to pull off. My professional license is only for CA, and we move so often it would not behoove me to set up a practice. I am not interested in an agency job, the work is draining, and I prefer to keep my energy for the people and things I love, for now. I value time with my family/daughter, having experiences, and traveling over money and things. So we choose to live more simply so that we can afford to do that. Plus I’m not gonna lie… working on my own terms, when I want, and creating my own schedule has ruined me. I am now a crazed freedom junkie.
What I do because I must: Protect my self care. Self care is sanity, self care impacts everyone around you, my self care affects my daughter, self care is everything…see how that works. Regular workouts & yoga practice. Gotta do it, gotta do it, gotta do it. For the endorphins, for the me time, for the brain to breathe, to help me be more present…gotta do it. Feel totally off when I skip more than a day. Here’s a little inside tip: It’s cheaper than therapy and just as effective for anxiety and depression. I could go on & on about this one but I’ll save it for a blog post.
Also, I must: be the change, be a community activist, have something to look forward to, and watch BRAVO. Don’t judge.
I am passionate about empowering women and girls, cultivating a sense of community/family, and strongly value cultural diversity. I have worked with, know, and love many women from all walks of life, from all corners of the world and have witnessed the transformation that happens when a woman is treated as a whole person. I’m starting this blog because I have a-ha moments, Sol-full conversations that blow my mind, wacky observations, rants, reviews, and brain chatter I’ve been encouraged to share and finally got ballsy enough to do. My hope is that it will provide unique insights from my perspective as a gypsy and jill-of-all-trades. Maybe it may parlay into another side hustle…who knows? Either way, thanks for being here, and thanks for letting me share my musings full of Sol.